Back in Monterrey

So my brave boyfriend made it through his surgery like a true Spartan and I was back on the road. Before going back to the gypsy lifestyle though, I had a relaxing month back in Monterrey. I wish I could say I did lots of cultural things that developed me further as a human being but that would be a big lie. I basically just ate tacos, drank beer and danced Mexican cowboy dancing all month long. It was heaven. I also went to a couple of museums but seeing as I have lived here before, I pretty much know them off by heart so even that was pleasurable and relaxing.

The best part of the month was when Flor, my best friend from México came to visit me and we spent the whole week chilling together, having girly nights out, relaxing during the day and charming our way to free drinks at night (don’t judge me I’ve been unemployed for 8 months). Did I mention tacos? I just can’t get enough of them. And now that I’ve been almost everywhere I can safely say that México has by far the best food in all of Latin America. It was good to be back. If you’re looking to go on a diet, it’s not the best place in the world to go. The large quantities of tortilla, juicy meat and beer (as well as many other delicious specialities) entering into your body is curiously enough not counterbalanced by the strenuous daily exercise of walking from the flat to the car door and back. North México is unfortunately like the U.S. in this sense that if you don’t have a car you will die a slow and painful death waiting for the bus that will never come or get run over by a Mexican who has mistaken you for a continuation of the asphalt because he’s never seen a pedestrian before. Ok I exaggerate, but it’s true you don’t walk anywhere, that’s one thing I don’t like about this place.

The other thing I will never understand is why when it’s almost 40°C people wear leather jackets and long jeans/trousers. I know it’s March and it’s technically not summer yet but I live in a country where people strip to their bikinis and go “sunbathing” as soon as it hits double figures, I don’t believe that wearing shorts and a strappy top when it’s 38 degrees with the sun out is completely unjustified. But I guess I’m still bitter from the one fat old Mexican man who yelled at me on the street that I had wondered a long way away from the beach. I confronted him and he shat himself and explained he was joking and I am beautiful and look very elegant. Elegant isn’t exactly the word I would use to describe my $5 Brazilian hot pants but at least I proved my point.

Anyway I digress…while in Monterrey I also managed to stock up on two of my favourite things from North México; cowboy boots and tapioca. I know the Asians have bought tapioca (also know as bubble tea) almost everywhere now but trust me there is nowhere that does it like Tapioca house in Monterrey. The perfect Oreo milkshake with the perfect amount of tapioca, it is just heaven in a cup and I know I already included it in a precious blog but it’s so amazing I thought it deserved another mention.

And finally cowboy boots. To the great dismay of my parents and probably secretly to many friends as well, I invested in two more pairs of cowboy boots, some ostrich ones and some crocodile ones (both shown below) which are the sexiest thing ever to be wrapped around my foot and a great excuse to get all my friends to take me to a cowboy bar. I can assure everyone I got my boots from a reputable dealer that doesn’t deal with endangered species, although we saw many dodgy places when Window shopping. One place we went into I asked where they get their elephant boots from and the salesman told me he doesn’t know, but not to worry because they are dead when they make the boot. Well that’s a relief, because in México, only animals you skin alive are endangered.

So I’m gona have to conclude because there is really not enough blog in the world for me once I start talking about Monterrey. People often ask me what it is that I love so much about this place and I can’t really put it into words. It’s not a blind admiration, there is a lot of things I don’t like about it and a lot of things that the Mexicans do that drive me up the bend but the whole package to me is just perfect. I had a great time, hung out with old friends, made new ones as well and was of course super sad to leave. But it was time to go and Flor and her Chihuahuense cowboys were waiting for me a plane ride away.